I dash the hopes and dreams of small business owners everywhere by underwriting their loan applications.

I love not having to sell people things they can't afford. I love approving a qualified applicant and contributing to making their dreams possible.

I'm with the first underwriter. Policy changes are no fun. Boss, "We do it this way." Crew, "Uh, when did that change?" Boss, "What do you mean? It's always been like that."

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Spock Jenkins of the Vulcan Jenkins'.