Astronomy in Time Magazine

[gethen]

Nice article in the May 12 issue of Time on the growing popularity of amateur astronomy in the U.S. (Like we didn't know.) Of particular interest to stargazers in the southern Texas area.

[Mr. X]

I don't really stargaze per se... for example to look at the sky requires a telescope for people with eyes as crappy as mine.

Having a telescope implies having money.

Being a student implies having a total income of zero dollars and zero cents.

Having a null income implies not having money.

Hence the incompatibility.

[nebularain]

:lol: Oh, how I can relate....

[Mr. X]

You're a student?

Somehow I thought you were a lower upper middle class with a monocle who talks with with an accent and plays polo with a tuxedo while drinking champagne and discussing about your stellar observations from your mansion.

This place is full of surprises. :D

[tracer]

If nebularain has a monocle, she also needs a cat to purr on her lap. That completes the required list of James Bond Supervillain paraphernalia.

Now, look up at Betelgeuse, and chortle, "No, Mr. Red Supergiant, I expect you to die!"

(I mean, what with Betelgeuse being one of those candidates for a supernova some time in the next few millennia, and all.)

[Mr. X]

Uh, I think Nebularain will be dead by the time it dies... :D

[aporetic_r]

Uh, I think Nebularain will be dead by the time it dies... :D

Not if Operation Arcturus proceeds according to plan...

Aporetic
www.polisci.wisc.edu/~rdparrish

[tracer]

But Arcturus (http://www.stellar-database.com/Scripts/search_star.exe?Name=Arcturus) is just a plain old run-of-the-mill red giant! It's not going to go supernova. It's just going to shed its outer layers in a big, slow, boring planetary nebula and leave a hum-drum white dwarf behind. (If you want a red star to be a supernova's progenitor, it really needs to be a red supergiant, like Betelgeuse.)

That is, unless Operation Arcturus calls for ... oh my God, no! You wouldn't! It's unthinkable!!

[kilopi]

I don't really stargaze per se...
Go to the nearest club. They love to show off their stuff, even to folk who can't contribute anything else to the club. There are lists of astronomy clubs, to find your local clubs.

[gethen]

You can also see lots of wonderful things in the sky with a pair of decent binoculars. You don't need lots of fancy equipment to enjoy the night sky.

[nebularain]

Somehow I thought you were a lower upper middle class
Are the lowers upper or are the uppers lower?

with a monocle
Well, I do wear contacts.

who talks with with an accent
Baltimorean? Or rather - Balt'morean.

and plays polo
I prefer riding Western-style than English-style on horses.

with a tuxedo
No, I am not a penguin, nor am I into females wearing masculine dresswear.

while drinking champagne
For some reason, I never liked the taste of anything with alcohol in it, so I never bothered trying to like it. In other words, champagne - Yuck!

and discussing about your stellar observations from your mansion.
Batman anyone?

If nebularain has a monocle, she also needs a cat to purr on her lap.
Well, I do have a cat, but she's not the lap-type. She prefers to suckle on my hair. Go figure!

[Rue]

Nebularain might be God.

[Mainframes]

Nebularain might be God.

Now we all know that Alanis Morrisette is God....

[Mr. X]

I don't really stargaze per se...
Go to the nearest club. They love to show off their stuff, even to folk who can't contribute anything else to the club. There are lists of astronomy clubs, to find your local clubs.

Uh yes... but the local club "insisted" that the price of entry was a telescope. No ifs, ands or buts.

So I said: "Screw you pal acting so high and mighty! You won't act so tough when I'll unleash the power of my 3p 14.4 kV circuit on your a..."

And the door slammed shut. So here I am, feasting on a healthy mix of week old pizza and pepto bismol put in a blender.

And I curse amateur astronomers! CURSE!

Nebularain is scary. But wait until I unleash the power of my 3p 14.4 kV circuit on your a...

Heh... I'm a nutcase.

[tracer]

Your 14.4 kV circuit only cost 3p? Wow, that's cheap!

[kilopi]

And I curse amateur astronomers! CURSE!
Wow, I didn't know things were so bad on Planet P.

Astronomy clubs on Earth are usually much more friendly.

[nebularain]

Nebularain is scary.

What'd I do to get picked on like this? :-?

Or to put it scientifically, what evidence do you have to state your claim? :o

[Mr. X]

I don't work on evidence... I work on instinct and my instinct is always right... it's a law... like Ohm's law only involving my instinct, it can't be demonstrated... it just is.

It can be observed too... I was right. :D

:D

[nebularain]

Mr. X, I really wish you would tell me what it is you have against me. If this is a joke, I'm not laughing. If this is serious, I wish you would be clear what you are talking about. What did you "observe?"

[Mr. X]

1- Yes, this is/was a joke.
2- You got it all backwards.
3- I have nothing against you.
4- Disregard it then.

No harm done. Thought it was pretty clear but whatever now.

Everyone's offended by everything these days.

Why I could talk about the reproduction of flies in New Zanzibar and someone would probably barge in here and tell me I offended them in some arcane, strange, weird, illogical and incomprehensible way.

So I just excuse myself even if every way I turn it it makes no sense [read : I'd be right not to excuse myself]. Don't want to get drawn into an argument here... although discussing fly reproduction is tempting!

Bleh.

[nebularain]

: nebularain curls up in a corner sucking her thumb and clinging to her teddybear :

[gethen]

Neb, I'm inclined to think he was just intimidated by your obviously superior intellect. :D

[Mark Skarr]

: nebularain curls up in a corner sucking her thumb and clinging to her teddybear :

I still love you, Neb.

[Mr. X]

: nebularain curls up in a corner sucking her thumb and clinging to her teddybear :

Did I miss something?

You're just intimidated by the fact I'm the first totally deranged person you meet.

Relax! I'm safely incarcerated in an institute for the criminally insane from where escape is impossible...although I have escaped before...

I hate being blunt... oh I can't carry on that lie any longer, I love it! :D

I'd look forward to meeting you but, you know... the restraints, the cell, the armed guards, 5 walls, guard towers, electrified fence, artillery...

I'm up to the artillery in my plan... should be soon enough! See you then!

Oh by the way... I'm not really in an institution... but the part about being insane... who knows! I can safely say that after meeting me... plenty of people do think so :P

Don't tell me you people don't get humor either?

So I need to add some astronomy... what about...

I claim the universe revolves around me...

[tracer]

I claim the universe revolves around me...
Just like Aristotle did? ;)