Oops, drunk again

[NEOWatcher]

This is the sister portion to the dumb criminal thread. More for drunks in the news that really don't fit into criminal, or Darwin award.

Now I'm sure everyone's familiar with the man overboard story today. But this one tells me that the witness was drunk along with the man overboard.
Cruise ship passenger rescued (http://www.wkyc.com/news/news_article.aspx?storyid=64501)
A witness told the Coast Guard that the man ran through a ship cabin window and fell into the water near Fort Lauderdale. It's not clear whether the window was open at the time.

[Whirlpool]

Lol.

Usually , people does crazy things when they're drunk.
Doesn't know how they did it and why they did it, its just when waking up the next morning, they just asked themselves ...."How did I get in here?

:doh:

[davidlpf]

Well I have feelling tomorrow, St Patricks day, will generate a few stories.

[HenrikOlsen]

Just remember, it's THREE leafed clover (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shamrock), not four leafed.

[Damien Evans]

Well I have feelling tomorrow, St Patricks day, will generate a few stories.

It's already St Patricks day on the good side of the date line...:D

[davidlpf]

It's already St Patricks day on the good side of the date line...:D
It is St patricks day here too but it is 2:30 in the mourning, should of just said St Patricks instead of tomorrow St Patricks day.

[RalofTyr]

I thought this thread would be about posting while drunk...


Note, most of the famous astronomers, Kepler, Galileo, Newton, were probably drunk when they came up with their discoveries.

[HenrikOlsen]

Source?

[thecolorofash]

I thought this thread would be about posting while drunk...


Note, most of the famous astronomers, Kepler, Galileo, Newton, were probably drunk when they came up with their discoveries.

I don't know about Newton & Kepler, but my guess is that Tycho Brahe was not quite sober either ;-)

[HenrikOlsen]

I don't know about Newton & Kepler, but my guess is that Tycho Brahe was not quite sober either ;-)
Since Brahe's work was in the meticulously precise observation, measurement and recording of star and planet positions, I think it's a fair bet to say he did his work sober.

What on earth gives you the idea he'd be drunk?

[thecolorofash]

Since Brahe's work was in the meticulously precise observation, measurement and recording of star and planet positions, I think it's a fair bet to say he did his work sober.

What on earth gives you the idea he'd be drunk?

I had no doubt regarding his meticulousity - I just made a joke - he did drink a lot - or so the story goes

He lost his nose in a duel with an equally sober nobel duellant ;-))

[Gillianren]

You know, ideas had while drunk are generally, in my experience, bad ideas. Some of them aren't, but I have a friend who spends time chemically altered on occasion, and she says that the important thing is to review your ideas again while sober, to make sure they still make sense. With that in mind, I would say categorically that the great ideas of science cannot come from those who are always drunk; among other things, they're expressed well enough so that sober people can understand them!

[Hydro]

Yeah, the entire "hold my beer and watch this" scenario rarely works out favorably.

Not that I would know. ;)

[thecolorofash]

I would say categorically that the great ideas of science cannot come from those who are always drunk; among other things, they're expressed well enough so that sober people can understand them!

Well said !

[R.A.F.]

...I just made a joke...

Still needs work...jokes are suppose to be funny.

[torque of the town]

It's a little known fact that Albert's first attempt at general relativity
followed a night on the Schnapps when he came up with
E=M+4, this was later revised however.

[Whirlpool]

How can you say you are already drunk....?

This is just one of my observations from my friends who went drunk.

a.You can't get the bottle or the glass put right in to your mouth. :doh:
b.You see people , wondering why they are "two" and the same..
c.When in a parking lot, you dont know where did you parked yor car, or you went to another parking lot and gone mad because you think your car was stolen.
d.You can't insert the key on the keyhole of your car. :doh:
e.You can't open the car , and gone mad by kicking it only to found out that it isnt your car , when the real owner comes out.. :mad:
f.You woke up the next morning ..and wonder .. where am I? :neutral:
g.You woke up the next morning..and wonder .. how did I get home? :neutral:
h.You woke up the next morning .. and found yourself ..Naked and saw someone beside you ..and ask "What happened last night?" :eek:

:D

[HenrikOlsen]

c.When in a parking lot, you dont know where did you parked yor car, or you went to another parking lot and gone mad because you think your car was stolen.
As in ... (http://www.daniellecorsetto.com/gws.html)

[Gillianren]

I got hit on by a passel of drunk girls last night. Reminded me all over again why I don't like drunk people.

[Tobin Dax]

I got hit on by a passel of drunk girls last night. Reminded me all over again why I don't like drunk people.

Maybe not quite the same, but I ended up "playing" a game of pool with a new student in our department who was rather drunk. When my turn came around, after he finally missed on shot #6, I had already given up on the game. That, and he was *very* annoying that whole night.

[Gillianren]

I was (fairly obviously) in the middle of a private conversation with a friend at the time. We indicated we were both taken, and we also were pretty obvious (I thought) about the fact that we didn't really want to talk to them. They then left to, and I quote, "go find a kegger--but I hope we don't get raped."

[V-GER]

The only time drunk people are OK is when they're your friends, someone you're trying to hit on(in a bar that is, not someone whose passed out in a gutter, I'm not a sicko) and most importantly, when you're drunk yourself...

Of course kids, if you don't want to spend your sunday mornings by apologizing for what you might have done the night before, just say no.(this is my public service moment)

[Gillianren]

See, I've never been drunk, and I even find my friends unpleasant when they are.

[Tobin Dax]

I was (fairly obviously) in the middle of a private conversation with a friend at the time. We indicated we were both taken, and we also were pretty obvious (I thought) about the fact that we didn't really want to talk to them. They then left to, and I quote, "go find a kegger--but I hope we don't get raped."
Sounds like a fun bunch.

[Gillianren]

Sounds like a fun bunch.

I was already feeling old that evening, too. (I'm not, but the people I met were awfully young. As in, born in the mid-80s.)

[mugaliens]

Just remember, it's THREE leafed clover (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shamrock), not four leafed.

Sorry, but I leave the three-leafed clovers to the bees.

I've got a book full of four-leafed clovers, though.

[V-GER]

I was already feeling old that evening, too. (I'm not, but the people I met were awfully young. As in, born in the mid-80s.)

I get hit on by drunken girls born in the mid 80's all too rarely.

[Tobin Dax]

I get hit on by drunken girls born in the mid 80's all too rarely.

I teach them and dance with them (two different thems, usually), but I have the same problem. That 5 years or so feels like a big difference sometimes.

[Gillianren]

The difference was as much as ten years for me.

[Frantic Freddie]

I've played in bars for 30+ years.
Yeah,I've got more than a few drunk stories....

[HenrikOlsen]

Sorry, but I leave the three-leafed clovers to the bees.

I've got a book full of four-leafed clovers, though.
Sure, you do that, just remember not to claim that they have any relevance to St. Pat's day or Ireland:)

[NEOWatcher]

Firefighter caught way out of uniform (http://www.newsnet5.com/news/11533213/detail.html)

With pictures and video. :eek: :sick:

[NEOWatcher]

Drunk Man Parks Horse In Bank Foyer (http://www.myfoxcleveland.com/myfox/pages/News/Detail?contentId=3023527&version=1&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=TSTY&pageId=3.7.1)
I guess that's better than finding its head in your bed.

[Roy Batty]

Drunk Man Parks Horse In Bank Foyer (http://www.myfoxcleveland.com/myfox/pages/News/Detail?contentId=3023527&version=1&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=TSTY&pageId=3.7.1)
I guess that's better than finding its head in your bed.
And it wasn't even a Lloyds Bank :)

[Fazor]

Dagnabbit I just saw this story and pulled this thread up to add it. At least I realized I was tooseeked before I posted, for once.

[LurchGS]

once upon a time having BEEN one of those drunks, and to add to Whirlpool:

Waking up in the back seat of your car in Dallas, on Wednesday, when the last thing you remember is going to that party in Chicago Friday night...

Ergo, I drink no more.

Fortunately for me, I've never liked inebriated people - of either gender. They're not funny. They're not insightful. They're not clever. They're not interesting. In fact, the only thing they *are* is stupid.

Deliberately killing brain cells is not, in my considered opinion, a bright thing to do. Alzheimer's is plenty scary in real life, why pretend?

[Gillianren]

Fortunately for me, I've never liked inebriated people - of either gender. They're not funny. They're not insightful. They're not clever. They're not interesting. In fact, the only thing they *are* is stupid.

Deliberately killing brain cells is not, in my considered opinion, a bright thing to do. Alzheimer's is plenty scary in real life, why pretend?

That's how I feel, too. It's one of the dozen or so reasons I've never been drunk myself.

[LurchGS]

You obviously came into your intelligence at an earlier age than I. My only redeeming choice was that I NEVER drank beer. Disgusting stuff.

I'm convinced it's no coincidence that the breweries are all located in the middle of ranch territory.

[Gillianren]

I'm convinced it's no coincidence that the breweries are all located in the middle of ranch territory.

We used to have one not five miles from where I sit; it closed a couple of years ago. Heck, there's still one not five miles from where I sit, albeit in a different direction. Washington is a land of microbreweries, though the one that closed was actually a Miller brewery.

[mugaliens]

Beer is "disgusting stuff?" Hmmm... Time to go have a hefeweisen...

Mixed drinks and shots give me the willies. Beer is great.

[mugaliens]

Firefighter caught way out of uniform (http://www.newsnet5.com/news/11533213/detail.html)

With pictures and video. :eek: :sick:

"Wayne Township does not condone the accused activities related to this incident," the statement said. "We expect our employees that are providing a service to our community to be good, honest, reputable citizens."

So going to a local nightclub to participate in a costume contest is somehow bad, dishonest, and irreputable???

:rolleyes:

A bit off the wall, considering the venue, but I can't call it immoral. About the only thing I can fault him for is driving while intoxicated.

[EvilEye]

I've never seen it in print anywhere, but I suspect Einstein may have thrown a few back in his day. He had a habit that is consistent with functional alcoholics.

After saying something, he would repeat it again to himself as a whisper.

[LurchGS]

Firefighter caught way out of uniform (http://www.newsnet5.com/news/11533213/detail.html)

With pictures and video. :eek: :sick:

So... is he suspended for DUI, for dressing like a woman, or for frequenting gay bars?

One would assume the former, but "upstanding" leaves a lot of room for interpretation

[mickal555]

I thought this thread would be about posting while drunk...


Note, most of the famous astronomers, Kepler, Galileo, Newton, were probably drunk when they came up with their discoveries.

Dunno about those guys..

But the people who came up with most of the contellations sure were!

Telescopium my ***.

Come to think of it, some of those deap sky objects look pretty dodge too...

[NEOWatcher]

Police: Nude Driver Tried To Hit Officer (http://www.myfoxcleveland.com/myfox/pages/News/Detail?contentId=3600860&version=1&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=TSTY&pageId=3.7.1)

Authorities said they didn't know why the man was naked.
Bryan Batulis Jr., 25, was arrested on [...] and driving while impaired by a drug.

If he was impaired, then does he need a reason to be naked? :think:

[Fazor]

If he was impaired, then does he need a reason to be naked?
Yeah, I thought the rule was "If you're not naked, you haven't drank enough!"

[NEOWatcher]

Interesting...

CNN Video: Drunk driver calls 911 to report herself (http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2008/01/29/leamanczyk.wi.driver.911.cnn)

I applaud the guy who convinced her to call 911.

[NEOWatcher]

Marriage Declared Invalid After Groom Learns He Drunkenly Said ‘I Do’ 30 Years Earlier (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,371265,00.html)

Australian married in 1966 didn't know he got married in Arizona in 1978.

He gets married in 2006 and tries to immigrate to Hawaii. Immigration says "guess what?".

Apparently the 1978 bride married in 1993 not knowing she was married either.

[Drunk Vegan]

Deliberately killing brain cells is not, in my considered opinion, a bright thing to do. Alzheimer's is plenty scary in real life, why pretend?

Actually drinking doesn't kill existing brain cells, it just prevents some new ones from forming. I figure I'm already smart enough, I can do without the slight IQ boost.

[tdvance]

I've heard this theory (admittedly, it might have been tongue-in-cheek) that drinking would make you smarter by ensuring the weakest cells die, and stronger ones replace them.

[NEOWatcher]

video: Drunken Texting (http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=4515322n)

Consuming alcoholic beverages can often lead to sending embarrassing text messages via cell phone, but CNET's Natlali Del Conte shows Chris Wragge and Erica Hill tips to avoid cyber blunders.

Uhm...How about not drinking to the point of stupid? :naughty: I doubt the stupidity at that point would be limited to cyber blunders anyway.

Isn't that one of the signs of a larger problem like alcoholism anyway? :think:

[Fazor]

Isn't that one of the signs of a larger problem like alcoholism anyway? :think:

I hope not... :whistle:
I've been known to say stupid things online "when the spirit fills me!".
But I have also been known to say stupid things online when stone-sober.

Guess that makes it a wash.

[mugaliens]

I've heard this theory (admittedly, it might have been tongue-in-cheek) that drinking would make you smarter by ensuring the weakest cells die, and stronger ones replace them.

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

[NEOWatcher]

Alaska man says he accidentally stole a car (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27571244/)


Charles J. Schultz explained that he was driving his Chevy Cavalier and everything was fine. That's when the trooper informed Schultz that he was actually behind the wheel of a Ford Escort.


And; can somebody explain to me how that can happen if there is a key needed to start the car? Either he was sober enough to actually steal it, or everyone leaves the key in their cars up there.

[Fazor]

Every single time you bring this thread up NEO, I've forgotten about it and think "Oh boy! NEO's drunk! Lets see what he posts like drunk!" Heh. Yay for my spotty memory!

Car interiors are different. Regardless of the "how did he start it" thing (which, by the way, is a very good question); wipers/lights are in different spots, radio dials/etc. are different, door handle/lock/button or whatever location is different, etc. I find it very doubtfull that he didn't know he was driving a different car.

I can all but garuntee what happened was he was drunk, and using (influenced) reasoning, decided it was okay to drive this one instead of his. But willfull imparement is not a defense, just the same as if you murder someone because you're drunk and not in the right state of mind, it's still murder.

[Spock Jenkins]

I've heard it said that you're not truly drunk until you have to hold on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.

[NEOWatcher]

Every single time you bring this thread up NEO, I've forgotten about it and think "Oh boy! NEO's drunk! Lets see what he posts like drunk!" Heh. Yay for my spotty memory!
That is a very rare circumstance for me nowadays (the drunk part, I doubt I could even post drunk)

I find it very doubtfull that he didn't know he was driving a different car.
It could be, but being drunk opens up some strange interpretations.
- Why does the car feel so different...oh well.
- Boy, I must be so drunk that the car feels different somehow.
- I thought I drove the Cavelier today.

I've heard it said that you're not truly drunk until you have to hold on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I've felt that before. Thus, my opening response to Fazor.

[NEOWatcher]

Sometimes you get overcome by witnesses and evidence that overshadows your alibi.

Police: Fla. Dad Let Son, 8, Drive Van (http://www.newsnet5.com/automotive/18695693/detail.html)

Belanger told police he'd taken Xanax, used to treat anxiety and panic attacks, and was "feeling woozy and didn't want to drive."
...
The boy told police his father took "liquid medicine" to feel better, pointing to an empty whiskey bottle in the vehicle.

[captain swoop]

I have hair raising drinking stories from my Navy days but Ican't tell them on here.

[tdvance]

Sometimes you get overcome by witnesses and evidence that overshadows your alibi.

Police: Fla. Dad Let Son, 8, Drive Van (http://www.newsnet5.com/automotive/18695693/detail.html)


I hope he didn't take Xanax AND whisky....they don't go together very well. But I'm told if you follow the recommend dose and have been on it long enough for the "initial" side effects to pass, Xanax doesn't do much to driving.

[NEOWatcher]

The not-so great pretender: Man falls off bridge (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/30382694/)

A 23-year-old man is in stable condition after he plummeted off a bridge over the Minnesota River while pretending to fall off the structure.

[NEOWatcher]

Pa. man accused of DUI in police parking lot (http://www.wkyc.com/news/watercooler/watercooler_article.aspx?storyid=115595&catid=91)


...a drunken driver who was speeding in a police station parking lot and stopped his car between two marked cruisers so he could take a nap...

[Fazor]

Pa. man accused of DUI in police parking lot (http://www.wkyc.com/news/watercooler/watercooler_article.aspx?storyid=115595&catid=91)

Makes sense. If you're going to be in a drunken slumber, it's nice to have some police close by to make sure you don't get mugged / car-jacked.

[NEOWatcher]

Police Pull Over Man 'Driving Commando' (http://www.newsnet5.com/news/19985936/detail.html)


The Newark, Del., man told the deputy he'd lost his pants, and the deputy didn't find any in the car.

I really hate it when that happens...

[Gillianren]

Well, if he'd lost them, they obviously wouldn't be in the car!

[tdvance]

Gee--he could sue for 64 Million dollars!