Approaching kilopi - Any advice?

[Jeff Root]

This will be my 3,103rd post. I'm rapidly approaching kilopi.

Is there anything I should do to prepare? Anything I should know?
All advice will be graciously accepted and critically ripped to shreds.

Thank you!

-- Jeff, in Minneapolis

[01101001]

I held my breath and closed my eyes.

I took a drink.

I didn't know if it was day or night
I started kissin' everything in sight...

[Maksutov]

Keep going...

[Reacher]

Wow, there's a term I haven't heard in a while.

[hhEb09'1]

1% Fun-n-games, but some of that is Mensa Test. More levity! :)

[Maksutov]

Wow, there's a term I haven't heard in a while.Yeah, that was quite a reach, some called it sour grapes, others gave 1000+ pardons, and most thought it was a silly milli360 longer.

But, all the same,...hey, Reacher, long time no see!

[jrkeller]

Keep going...

I second that

[hhEb09'1]

I can supply you with ... options

When the inevitable kilopi is imminent, it is permitted in conscience to take the decision to refuse forms of appellation that would only secure a precarious and burdensome prolongation of count, so long as the normal derision due to a sick individual in similar cases is not interrupted. :) (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Euthanasia)

[Disinfo Agent]

Look attentively to your right and to your left. If no obstacles are within sight, then proceed with caution.

[mike alexander]

Do nothing at this time. When you receive the communication respond with the value for the polarizability of solid carbon dioxide. Four significant figures, and be sure to round DOWN.

Then sit back and relax. It's quite a ride.

[grant hutchison]

Do nothing at this time. When you receive the communication respond with the value for the polarizability of solid carbon dioxide. Four significant figures, and be sure to round DOWN.Gad. I rounded UP. That explains a lot of things.

Grant Hutchison

[Web Crawler]

get out while you still can

[peteshimmon]

How about the Golden Ratio? Must be worth a
few nods.

[davidlpf]

Hold on tight put your head between your legs and take a deep breath.

[Tensor]

Hold on tight put your head between your legs and take a deep breath.

I recommend you don't take a deep breath. Or, take the breath before putting you head between your legs.

[davidlpf]

I thought it was part of hazing ritual.

[Maksutov]

I thought it was part of hazing ritual.Would you like another?

[Swift]

First, coat your entire body with bear fat. If you don't have any bear fat, Crisco will do.
Next, memorize the first 1000 digits of pi (don't remove the fat while you do this).
Await further instructions.

[hhEb09'1]

What's weird, is the fourth layer is moose fat, and that doesn't seem to come off!

[Jeff Root]

I have the Crisco -- just enough left, I think, and pi memorized to 50 digits.
I don't know where to get moose fat. Why do I need to do this?

-- Jeff, in Minneapolis

[hhEb09'1]

I don't know where to get moose fat. Why do I need to do this?You won't need the moose fat until post 12566, so relax. Besides, I think Mak has some left over, he'll share.

[Jeff Root]

Oh, okay. Thanks.

Wait a minute... I still don't know why I need to do this.

-- Jeff, in Minneapolis

[BigDon]

If I don't mention I'm getting close too, can I skip the moose fat?

[Swift]

If I don't mention I'm getting close too, can I skip the moose fat?
Nope too late!!!

[Swift]

Oh, okay. Thanks.

Wait a minute... I still don't know why I need to do this.

-- Jeff, in Minneapolis
If you have to ask, you might just not be ready. We might have to take a few of those posts away, until you've had time to think about all the consequences.

[mike alexander]

Ah, it's more like Crossing the Line. Ready or not, here it comes.

But remember, if you're the 1,000,000th customer you will recieve a free Ethos eyepiece from TeleVue.

[ToSeek]

If you think that's bad, you should see what you have to do when you hit myria-phi posts. I still can't bring myself to talk about it, though maybe Maksutov will be able to. If he's still able to post afterwards, that is.

[mike alexander]

The most important thing to remember is how fast you are going when you hit the post.

Put everything else out of your mind and concentrate on your speed (velocity if you are a physicist). Immediately after hitting the post, when you wake up, ask, "Kenneth, what is the frequency?"

I think you'll be pleasantly surprised when Victoria Principal opens the shower door and realizes it has all been a dream.

[Maksutov]

If you think that's bad, you should see what you have to do when you hit myria-phi posts. I still can't bring myself to talk about it, though maybe Maksutov will be able to. If he's still able to post afterwards, that is.147 to go. See you on the other side. And thanks for the "information". Always liked the Aleut language and FEA. http://img137.imageshack.us/img137/566/iconwink6tn.gif

[mfumbesi]

Count your fingers,
Count your toes.....

[Jeff Root]

Well, I passed the kilopi mark, and I don't know how fast I was going when
I did it. I'm certain that I was accelerating, though, and I think that's a
good thing.

One question: I don't need to put this Crisco on my hair, do I? I hope not.
I don't think I'd have enough in that case.

-- Jeff, in Minneapolis

[hhEb09'1]

Hmmm, good question. How about, just cut off the hair, that'll do.

[mike alexander]

If you're driving, just keep your hands on the wheel and sit in the Crisco.

Glad you made it. Isn't it amazing? The colors, all the gold just lying around, the unlimited American Express card they hand you.

We try to explain it to others, but it comes off either as bragging or lying.

[Swift]

One question: I don't need to put this Crisco on my hair, do I? I hope not.
I don't think I'd have enough in that case.

Enough hair or enough Crisco?

[Maksutov]

Well, here we go! Wish me luck!


waves at chrissy

[Maksutov]

Made it to myria-phi with the last post. Now I'm on the "other side" thanks to the help provided by ToSeek. Wow, what a ritual! We don need no steenking crisco!

Man, sure is different over here. ToSeek has no goatee, for example. And the captain appears a lot friendlier. I asked the crew about the "device" where some folks would just disappear and they looked puzzled.

The inner workings of the BAUT are a marvel, beyond description. They put the Krell machine to shame. Hats off to Fraser and Phil!

Now to perform a few experiments to determine exactly how many dimensions are in play over here. I've evidence for eleven so far.

Signing off from the other side, and

Take care,

Mak.

waves at chrissy

[chrissy]

hey stop waving your causing a 4 dimentional gale force wind back here!

have you managed to get back out of there or is it better than here?


*waves back* what the heck the wind will dry the clothes better

[ToSeek]

Now to perform a few experiments to determine exactly how many dimensions are in play over here. I've evidence for eleven so far.


You'll find that it correlates with the phases of the Moon and the number of days since the BA had a blog entry that made it to the front page of Digg, along with a few other factors I haven't been able to confirm yet. Basically, don't be surprised if your experiments don't yield consistent results.




I miss my goatee.

[Maksutov]

hey stop waving your causing a 4 dimentional gale force wind back here!OK, waving stopped. Had no idea what kind of interdimensional meteorological "warfare" that would cause! have you managed to get back out of there or is it better than here?In some ways it's better, in others, well, I miss certain aspects of the old plane of existence. I can get out, but seems for the short I have to split into one of my components.


*waves back* what the heck the wind will dry the clothes betterOK, just a little wave then, to help with the laundry.

[Maksutov]

You'll find that it correlates with the phases of the Moon and the number of days since the BA had a blog entry that made it to the front page of Digg, along with a few other factors I haven't been able to confirm yet. Basically, don't be surprised if your experiments don't yield consistent results.Thanks for the information, ToSeek!. Moon phase shouldn't be a problem, and I can dig the other one as being somewhat aleatory. Please let me know when you confirm those other factors. Will keep experimenting though. Sure was weird getting 2.71828 one time and 6.67300 another, though.

Meanwhile what a fascinating realm! So much to learn about. Perspective (from additional dimensions) is an amazing thing.




I miss my goatee.Understood. But at least you still have your mustache, which seems to indicate you have achieved balance and oneness with the force.

:)

[ToSeek]

Thanks for the information, ToSeek!. Moon phase shouldn't be a problem, and I can dig the other one as being somewhat aleatory. Please let me know when you confirm those other factors. Will keep experimenting though. Sure was weird getting 2.71828 one time and 6.67300 another, though.


I wouldn't swear to it, but I think there's also a connection to the rate of postings in the "Word Association Game II" thread - some days (if you can call them days) I think I can tell chrissy is in the "Fun and Games" forum just by the increased degree of dimensional warping at the event horizons. Also, when anyone with more than kilopi posts changes their avatar, things can get very strange for a while - probably should have mentioned that before; just be prepared. You'll get used to it after the first few times, though.

And I'm going to start growing the goatee back. I don't care what the captain says.

[mike alexander]

Speaking of interdimensional transfers...

[Kaptain K]

I miss my goatee.

It's not a goatee, it's a Van Dyke!

[Maksutov]

It's not a goatee, it's a Van Dyke!Tuning in...turning on...dropping in....there we are!

He only lost his goatee. He still has a mustache. You need both for a Van Dyke.

But it's OK. He's growing it back.

Amazing things these 4-dimensional folks get concerned about!

Tuning out...turning off...dropping out...we now return control of your 4-dimensional world to you, until our next visit.

[ToSeek]

Some further notes: Keep in mind that what we have in this reality is a geometric manifold of the BAUT forum in phase space in all of its manifestations and then some (i.e., all phenomena in BAUT space have their counterparts in this one, though there are aspects of this space that don't seem to match anything in BAUT space, though it may just be that I haven't discovered the correlations). If you haven't realized it already, those bright purplish specks are posts, with magnitude roughly correlated with degree of erudition. (You can see some of JayUtah's from over a light year away!) If you adjust your viewpoint to parallel somewhere along the 6/7/8th dimension (depending on the factors previously discussed), you'll see the posts line up as threads. The long but very dim series are from "Fun and Games", with an occasional brighter one when someone comes up with something that's actually clever. The alternating bright-and-dim ones are usually ATM discussions. Really bright and dim alternations are almost always Jay putting the smackdown on an Apollo hoax believer.

Meanwhile, if you can figure out what those wispy chartreuse things are, let me know.

[The Supreme Canuck]

Meanwhile, if you can figure out what those wispy chartreuse things are, let me know.

Those are probably the posters who get stuck at Kilopi, where time dilation is infinite. They just... stop. That's why you need to either go over the limit, or stay under it.

[hhEb09'1]

Meanwhile, if you can figure out what those wispy chartreuse things are, let me know.Whoa, I thought you'd know. I figured they were the (almost) invisible moderator posts, barely detectable by normal beings. Those are probably the posters who get stuck at Kilopi, where time dilation is infinite. They just... stop. That's why you need to either go over the limit, or stay under it.The limit is actually a transendental real number. I've verified that by stopping both above and below, and, paradoxically, you don't slow down and almost stop--you travel in time. It's kinda cool, but sometimes I wish I didn't know what happens to Dick Cheney and Bill Clinton and Paula Abdul.

[The Supreme Canuck]

The limit is actually a transendental real number. I've verified that by stopping both above and below, and, paradoxically, you don't slow down and almost stop--you travel in time. It's kinda cool, but sometimes I wish I didn't know what happens to Dick Cheney and Bill Clinton and Paula Abdul.

Huh. Well, you'd know - I just moved on quickly to avoid the mess. The warnings were dire. Is that how Colt joined in 1969?

[chrissy]

I wouldn't swear to it, but I think there's also a connection to the rate of postings in the "Word Association Game II" thread - some days (if you can call them days) I think I can tell chrissy is in the "Fun and Games" forum just by the increased degree of dimensional warping at the event horizons.
Oh! blame me then! just keeping the games going since being crowned the guru I have to be there to keep them towing the line. :)
I must check out the time, space continuum on that event horizon see where it may take me...............whoa.................wow.......in teresting.......I saw faces......they...they....looook.......

[hhEb09'1]

Oh! blame me then! just keeping the games going since being crowned the guru I have to be there to keep them towing the line. :)I didn't know BAUT had a tug of war, can I join in?

[chrissy]

I didn't know BAUT had a tug of war, can I join in?

now that depends on how good you are, the team only want the best!

Meanwhile, if you can figure out what those wispy chartreuse things are, let me know.

I think I might have solved that one while I was studying the event horizon, they are the lurker shadows !

[Kaptain K]

I think hhEb09'1 was referring to the fact that the phrase is "toeing the line"!

[hhEb09'1]

now that depends on how good you are, the team only want the best!My nickname is "gravity"
I think hhEb09'1 was referring to the fact that the phrase is "toeing the line"!Hey, you didn't know about it either? C'mon, it'll be fun.

[Kaptain K]

Dang! It ain't easy being straight man around here! Everybody's a commodian!

[ToSeek]

Whoa, I thought you'd know. I figured they were the (almost) invisible moderator posts, barely detectable by normal beings.

No, the moderator posts are the ones that glow so brightly with erudition that they're only visible in the ultraviolet. I think Chrissy's hypothesis is worth considering.

[davidlpf]

Do sock puppets appear as small dense objects clustered around each other in small groups.

[mike alexander]

Kaptain K observed:
Everybody's a commodian!

What, they worship toilets or something?


On second thought, I knew a couple of guys in college who spent weekends doing just that.

[Jeff Root]

Even if everyone is a commodore, there still has to be a head commodore.

.

[mike alexander]

The head commadore is referred to as the apostrophadore, since he's above everyone else. Unless it's a she, in which case she is naturally high, so it doesn't matter.

[chrissy]

I think hhEb09'1 was referring to the fact that the phrase is "toeing the line"!

nope I meant pulling the threads together!
hhEb09'1 you can be the anchor man then!

[Swift]

Even if everyone is a commodore, there still has to be a head commodore.

.
Isn't that Lionel Richie?

[mike alexander]

A guy sold me a bottle of extremely dry wine.
Turns out it was just an empty bottle.

But 'bottle' is an interesting-sounding word. As a verb it seems to suggest ambling along in a peculiar way: "I just saw Andy, bottling down the footpath."

It could also be a board game from the 1950's, the game you took up after parcheesi. Or perhaps a minor curse: "Oh, bottle the man!"

I think 'Stonkerbottle' would be a good name for a villain if you're not more than five years old. Or not less than five drinks in.

[Swift]

Wow, I wish we could bottle what you got Mike. Then we could toss it in the ocean and some kid in Japan will find it washed up on the beach in about 7 years.

[mike alexander]

...and whatever posts here, posts alone.

[Maksutov]

Surely those are very haunting words, those.

Solid, Jackson! Salt of the Earth.

[chrissy]

WOW! that event horizon was something else!
I told you I saw some strange things in there!
Oh! you have been there too Mak......Paul......Mike....there's some one else there too......

[Maksutov]

Curiouser and curiouser....

[Paul Beardsley]

It was the most horizontal horizon I ever saw - even though I wasn't. (Horizontal, that is.)

[Swift]

Curiouser and curiouser....
said Alice.

I don't know, it looks pretty usual to me.

[mike alexander]

On a clear day you can see forever.

[chrissy]

Ah! It was the swift frog/dragon who I saw!
Is it just me or has everything gone green?

[Maksutov]

Green? Souper!

[chrissy]

Oh! just the one bowl please.

[Maksutov]

There you go.

Remember, it's very quiet in here so don't clang your spoon against the side of the bowl.

[chrissy]

ok, will remember that Mak! thanks for the bowl.

[Paul Beardsley]

Eat your soup swiftly, chrissy - don't let it drag on!

[Tobin Dax]

I really need to start reading screennames, and not just go by avatars. This page was confusing for a while.:doh:

[chrissy]

Thanks Paul, but this might drag on for some time!

[cjl]

Wow - that was REALLY confusing me for a while :lol:

[mike alexander]

So what's confusing?

Confuzyus say: If Jimmy crack corn, why care?

[chrissy]

Ah! Confusious say, "he who can't read just look at pictures"!

[Tobin Dax]

Ah! Confusious say, "he who can't read just look at pictures"!
Hey! I resemble that remark. :mad:

[chrissy]

What! :)

[mike alexander]

Is it still yesterday? If it is, then I still have time to think ahead with enthusiasm. But if it's already today, all I can do is look back with regret

[hhEb09'1]

I think we're nearly into tomorrow, so you can enjoy the fruits of your forethinking.

[Paul Beardsley]

I thought it was the day after next already.

[Maksutov]

I think we're nearly into tomorrow, so you can enjoy the fruits of your forethinking.Forethinking is only good if it is properly skinned.

[Jeff Root]

Jeff: "My stomach is upset."
Jeff: "Why? What did you say to it?"
Jeff: "Huh? What do you mean?"
Jeff: "What did you say to your stomach?"
Jeff: "I didn't say anything to my stomach."
Jeff: "Oh, well, no wonder it's upset, if you won't talk to it."
Jeff: "Do you realize you are talking to yourself?"
Jeff: "I am not."
Jeff: "Yes you are."
Jeff: "I am not. I'm talking to all those people reading on BAUT."
Jeff: "What do you think this is? The 'Should nervous people be allowed
to play tennis?' thread?"
Marcel Marceau: "Oh, shoot!"

[Whirlpool]

:confused::doh:

got me confused with pictures!

[hhEb09'1]

Forethinking is only good if it is properly skinned.Cool. I'm going to make me a briefcase.

[Maksutov]

Cool. I'm going to make me a briefcase.Congratulations! I take it you finally graduated from Fayetteville Technical Community College (http://www.faytechcc.edu/SQLCriteria/WebMCL/dsearch.asp?ID=FSE)?

;)

[hhEb09'1]

Thanks! But EDU 234 (http://www.faytechcc.edu/SQLCriteria/WebMCL/dsearch.asp?ID=EDU) has helped me the most, on BAUT :)

[mike alexander]

If forethinking is only good if properly skinned, then foreskinning is...



Never mind.


Anyhow, be careful with that briefcase. Rub it too much and it might turn into a steamer trunk.

[chrissy]

and don't take it out in the cold, it might turn into a wallet!

[Paul Beardsley]

and don't take it out in the cold, it might turn into a wallet!

Will it?

[chrissy]

no wallet! ;)

[mike alexander]

Is this where we put in the story of the mohel who never charged for his services?


He only took tips.

[chrissy]

from a wallet made of some kind of skinned thing!