http://www.jupiterscientific.org/sci...nomyjokes.html

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"You can't convince a believer of anything; for their belief is not based on evidence, it's based on a deep seated need to believe." [Carl Sagan]

I'm not really sure how to deal with folks who feel they need to explain a joke about "Preparation A". [img]/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]

Hey, I even got the "black hole" joke, and I'm a total Non-Astronomy Person.

Limerick

There once was a lady named Bright
Who could travel far faster than light
She set out one day
In a relative way
And came back the previous night.

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Any day you wake up on "the right side of the dirt" is a good day.

T. Anderson

Limirick

Their once was a man named Gene
Who had the fastest machine on the scene
He went driving one night
As fast as light
and blue shifted all the red lights to green

Jokes from Odenwald's website...
http://itss.raytheon.com/cafe/qadir/q1379.html

Then there's the mission to sun. "Won't it get too hot?" "No, we'll go at night."

http://www.lfmn.com/lifeminder30/mht...s/us020426.gif

__________________
"You can't convince a believer of anything; for their belief is not based on evidence, it's based on a deep seated need to believe." [Carl Sagan]

Thank you all for contributing the humor. This is a great site, filled with wonderful people with excellent senses of humor.

ljbrs [img]/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_smile.gif[/img] [img]/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_wink.gif[/img] [img]/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_rolleyes.gif[/img] [img]/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_confused.gif[/img]

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"There is in the universe neither center nor circumference." Giordano Bruno Born 1548. Torched 1600.

Well, here's one I heard only today:

Why did the chicken cross the Moebius strip?

To get to the same side.

Well, this may not be related directly to astronomy, so feel free to boo.

Electricity was invented by three dwarves named Amp, Ohm, and Erg...

(sheepish grin)

Watt happened to Volt?

Reminds me of a story told by a lecturer.

Man runs red light and is stopped by a policeman.

Man trying to be clever claims that it looked green because of dopler shift.

Policeman thinks about this for a few moments and does a few quick calculations. He then hands over a speeding ticket with a fine, with every 10 mph over the limit costing £50. It was left as an exercise to work out how much the fine would be (in a urban area in the UK the speed limit is 30mph).

Simon

http://www.satirewire.com/news/jan02/asteroid.shtml



SCIENTISTS TO STUDY GIANT ASTEROIDS
BY STEERING THEM INTO EARTH
Are Major Asteroid As Dangerous As Predicted? The Answer Arrives in 2003

London (SatireWire.com) — Disappointed after failing to take advantage of Earth's relatively near miss with a large asteroid on Monday, scientists today excitedly unveiled what they called an "asteroid chute" that they said will direct the next massive space object directly into Earth's path, where it can be studied more closely.
.......