I opened my mailbox this afternoon when I got home from work and found one of those little junk mail packets of post-card type advertisements. Now these things are usually for seed catalogs and replacement windows and the like, but one of the cards in today's packet was one advertising :
NAME YOUR OWN CONSTELLATION !!!!!
Here is part of the spiel : The italics are mine but they lay on the exclamation points pretty heavily. It doesn't say just how much the prospective proprietor of the exclusive new asterism has to fork over, buyers are directed to fill out and return the card to American Home Direct Corp. for more information.
Hurry folks, before you miss your chance!!!!

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If you can't dazzle 'em with dexterity, baffle 'em with BS.

I'd rather adopt a Orca, you get to name them. Although this stuff belongs on the back page of consumer reports.

Gee, I have led groups of grade school students in this activity and they took home their own constellations to show their parents and it was all FREE!

Guess they got a bargain #-o

Rob

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"Crackpot theories 1 : Regular theories a billion." Fry

pay to name a constellation?? just go out in your back yard and make up your own, this reminds me of the people selling property on the moon, umm ok who said they owned it to begin with?

Someone who named a star with the Star Registry isn't going to like it when I buy a constellation and the star he named becomes Alpha Chucki.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. All of your choices are bad for you.

That sounds very astronomically astute. The Big Dipper isn't a constellation, it's an asterism.

Why stop at constellations? How about name your own GALAXY! (oh, ahh). There are billions and billions of them (sorry Carl) so plenty of product to sell. Or wait.... how about name your own parallel universe. I'm naming one after my cat Samantha, it will be the universe where there are 26 hours in the day so she can get even more sleep.

It reminds me of an old quote about the lottery, its a tax on those who don't understand statistics. Maybe this is a tax on those who don't understand astronomy.

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At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

One Earth, One Sky - IYA 2009
All moderation in purple

Nope, I bought the "Big Dipper" region and named it "Sparky". It's a constellation now, so get used to it.

During breaks on a radio talk show I listen to on the way home from work, there is an ad for the "International Star Registry"...I keep myself from smashing the radio, so I change the station until the ad is over.

Actually, it would be Alpha Chuckis, unless you change your name to Chuckus. The -i ending for the genitive case applies only the second declension, where the words end in -us in the nominative. Anything that doesn't end in -a (1st declension) or -us (second declension) is third declension (there are fourth and fifth declension but they're weird) and that declines thus:

SING
NOM Chuck
ACC Chuckem
GEN Chuckis
DAT Chucki
ABL Chucke

PLUR
NOM Chuckes
ACC Chuckes
GEN Chuckium
DAT Chuckibus
ABL Chuckibus

Dibs on the one without shrimp.

Usually the stars in the star registry are kind of dim, aren't they? So it would probably be further down in the greek alphabet--say Upsilon Chuckis. Any bets on what abbreviation it would acquire?

Careful what you wish for!

Waahhhh, waaahhh (sorry, there is no emoticon for crying like a baby).

Actually, that's a bargin. A whole galaxy for $20. That's probably less than a penny a star! See, it pays to buy in bulk. I'm going to name it Galaxy 500 after my dad's old Ford. :roll:

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At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

One Earth, One Sky - IYA 2009
All moderation in purple

You also get to have the title, Galactic Lord Master.

Can I serve evition notices?

Hello, my name is Skip Jones and I am here to interview star 1234A regarding the decision to rename the star after a human being living on the planet Earth.

Skip Jones:So how do you feel about being named after a human being living on the Plant Earth?

1234A:Earth? Never head of them. [Short pause]. Oh yes, planet Earth. I rememeber them now. Those are the beings who have only gone to the nearest heavenly body and they think they know what their talking about when it comes to unlocking the secrets of the Universe. Yes, well i'm not surprised they would show their ignorance once again.

Skip Jones:I am a native of the planet Earth as well. Some of us believe in Astrology.

1234A:Really? Hmmmm. That sounds a lot like them. It doesn't surprise me. We could care less about their meaningless lives.

Skip Jones:Some of us also believe a rogue planet name Planet X is going to collide with us and wipe us out and it would mean the destruction of our planet.

1234A:Ha ha. What else can I say about that?

Skip Jones:Well, thanks for you're time. Maybe we can talk again sometime in the future?

1234A:Yes, maybe. Just don't blow you're planet up.

Skip Jones:Ha ha. We will try not to.