The Chore - in a specially designed capsule, five "clutternauts" led by 8-year-old Johnny Strand must descend to the bottom of his bedroom floor and find the terrifying secret truth lurking under all the junk. Also, they have to clean that pig sty up before they're allowed to go outside and play.

- J

Speed Raker: after crashing the Mach 5 while staying out past curfew with Trixie, Speed must redeem himself in the family garden.

Mystical Pizza: A teenaged girl develops profound psychic insights and powers when she inadvertently stares at the pepperoni on her pizza while mooning over an ex-boyfriend.

Then she turns into Scarrie and gets revenge.

Indiana Jones and the Dimple of Doom - 120 minutes of nothing but Harrison Ford's dimpled chin.

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If I set the budget, we'd have Ares and more. Unfortunately, I don't set the budget, and Ares is just too expensive and too far out for us to accomplish our goals within the budget we were given.

If we halt the ISS, all versions of Ares, and transport Orion and Altair aboard DIRECTv3's Jupiter family of Shuttle-Derived Launch Vehicles, we just might make it back to the Moon by 2020.

The Bardian - For the next 90 minutes, we'll explore 7 ways to bard your birds.

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If I set the budget, we'd have Ares and more. Unfortunately, I don't set the budget, and Ares is just too expensive and too far out for us to accomplish our goals within the budget we were given.

If we halt the ISS, all versions of Ares, and transport Orion and Altair aboard DIRECTv3's Jupiter family of Shuttle-Derived Launch Vehicles, we just might make it back to the Moon by 2020.

Dusk til Dawn : an all night fancy dress party that ends up in many fights!

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You can please some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time. But you can not please all of the people all of the time.

"Why change passwords when you've got a baseball bat?"

Saving Ryan's Privates.... eye watering documentary of bear traps and other ground hugging instruments of capture...

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I don't believe in mathematics. Albert Einstein

Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female. Desmond Morris.

Quantum analysis is scientific dithering

Professor Frink: My observations n'hey, n'hey, show the universe could be a torus Weh, uh, or toriod it may like the typewriters and bananas and the monkeys with big teeth the biting the screaming Mm-hai!

Homer: mmmmm... doughnuts!

A fridge too far.... Woody Allen movie about the anxieties of a couch potato who can't reach his beers.

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I don't believe in mathematics. Albert Einstein

Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female. Desmond Morris.

Quantum analysis is scientific dithering

Professor Frink: My observations n'hey, n'hey, show the universe could be a torus Weh, uh, or toriod it may like the typewriters and bananas and the monkeys with big teeth the biting the screaming Mm-hai!

Homer: mmmmm... doughnuts!

My Private Garden Hoe: Nothing gets between this man and his beloved spuds, especially not naughty gnomes!

Magnum pi: spin-off of the show Numbers, in which Charlie Eppes grows a mustache and moves to Hawaii. Once there, he solves mysteries while helping Larry build a second Large Hadron Collider to search for Higgins-Boson particles.

A Fistful of Euros: It's 1880 and the American West economy is horrid. French Foreign Legionists gallop into Dodge with sacks full of Euros to save the day!

The Good Son, the Bad Seed and the Ugly Betty: now grown up and married, Betty Suarez is faced with the terrible decision whether to save her cold-blooded-killer son or her cold-blooded-killer daughter while getting the latest issue of Mode to the printer on time and protecting her father from a violent immigration agent played by Sigourney Weaver. Comedy. 90 min.

You know, I can see a TV series like that happening...

Please keep it up, guys, this thread has given me plenty of good chuckles. I only wish I had enough imagination to contribute.

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"A witty saying proves nothing" Voltaire.
"All your bias are belong to us" Ara Pacis.

Sledders: every hill is a potential-dropping joy ride to an alternate dimension for our spatial-temporal traveling heroes. This week, the gang finds themselves in the world of Edwin A. Abbott's Flatland. Series Finale.

Isn't the idea of the thread to come up with something even worse than the original concept?

My apologies, Drunk Vegan. How about this instead?

Star Wars 4000: Achoo Hope: Jedi microbiologists must use the Force to culture midichlorians while working on a cure for the common cold. You'll be on the edge of your seats while the Jedi search Watto's junkyard to find parts for the broken autoclave. Rated PG-13 for mature thematic material, including graphic scenes of potato dextrose agar innoculation.

Dear lord, such filth! Filthy, filthy, filthy filth!
Star Trek XXX- No, it not a pornographic film, it is just the thirtieth one made.

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Contac - Ellie searches the cosmos for cold relief

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At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

One Earth, One Sky - IYA 2009
All moderation in purple

Clog Soldiers... Dutch army recruitment video


Bling Kong.... Movie about a giant gorilla and his quest to own a stretch humvee and matching accessories

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I don't believe in mathematics. Albert Einstein

Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female. Desmond Morris.

Quantum analysis is scientific dithering

Professor Frink: My observations n'hey, n'hey, show the universe could be a torus Weh, uh, or toriod it may like the typewriters and bananas and the monkeys with big teeth the biting the screaming Mm-hai!

Homer: mmmmm... doughnuts!

The Silence of the Sams: David Berkowitz [aka "The Son of Sam"] and other wannabe copycat serial killers who also call themselves "Sam" join in a silent protest against lumpy prison oatmeal.

"Weiner takes all".....a new reality show based on the US Presidential election where the election is determined by which candidate creates the best hotdog.

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..just because you're a genius doesn't make you a smart guy..

The Pursuit of Crapiness: The tale of a little league team in last place

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Show me the money
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The Seven Sam-I-am: A tale of honour, courage, and hope set in the harsh but beautiful war-torn land of Dr. Seuss' imaginitive stories.

- J

Obama Reloaded.... our first black President finds out that his hard won success was just a elaborate ruse by THE MAN's supercomputer. It's time for Change in the Matrix, Obama style.

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..just because you're a genius doesn't make you a smart guy..

Fatal Retraction... An attractive married male lawyer with an arm injury is unfortunately given a referral to a villainous physical therapist.

The Muppet Pastors - Fozzie and friends get Religion.

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The most important mental attribute anyone can have is the ability to recognize when one's own comprehension of a topic is insufficient. Without that, one's knowledge simply becomes tautological: it is "impossible" for there to exist wisdom one does not already possess. - JayUtah

There is no light in space. - Moon Man

Stargate Cleveland......the Goa'uld in secret, activate a hidden Stargate deep in the heart of downtown Cleveland. In the first episode the SGC without hesitation uses a 100MT fission-fusion device on Cleveland thus ending the Goa'uld threat and any more annoying episodes.

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..just because you're a genius doesn't make you a smart guy..

Edward Scissorstongue: A young girl learns the hard way not to french kiss certain guys (especially if he comes from a creepy castle and wears ripped-up black leather).

Dark Civvies: In the latest episode of The Real Life, Paris Hilton joins and is immediately thrown out of the military.

To fill in the other 50 minutes of the show, she's forced to wear only dark clothing. Her mood suffers, and eventually she commits a murder-suicide on herself and her annoying little dog.

(hey, I'd watch it. actually.)

Star Wars II: Attack of the Clowns: The Jedi face the Galaxy's newest threat: Disgruntled clowns who, tired of working for peanuts at circuses around the Galaxy, have turned to the Dark Side and are Darth Sidious' new minions. The Jedi must learn quickly how to deal with laughing gas, flower squirters, honking red noses, oversized red shoes and whoopie cushions as weapons!