GEORGE W BUSH
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

HANS BLIX
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it!

RALPH NADER
The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

PAT BUCHANAN
To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

RUSH LIMBAUGH
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet that somebody out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this?!? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax
dollars. And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build a road for chickens to cross.

MARTHA STEWART
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die in the rain. Alone.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough..

BARBARA WALTERS
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together - in peace.

ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX
It was an historic inevitability.

RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?

CAPTAIN KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.

SIGMUND FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES
I have just witnessed eChicken2003, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet explorer is an integral part of eChicken.

ALBERT EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE
I invented the chicken!


COLONEL SANDERS (KFC guy)
Did I miss one?

this is great!

where did you get it?

__________________
One nuclear bomb could wreck your whole day.

lol a forwarded email i got some time ago.

well, it's very clever

__________________
One nuclear bomb could wreck your whole day.

Oh, my. Have we really reached the point where Colonel Sanders needs to be identified as the "KFC guy"?!

That makes me feel . . . old.

(BTW, the whole thing was very funny!)

__________________
SeanF

"Ask to understand, but don't challenge unless you have the knowledge."--NEOWatcher

The contents of this post are ©2009 by SeanF and may not be copied or retransmitted in any form without the express written consent of SeanF

Makes you feel old? I'm only 17 and I know who he is. Who doesn't?

__________________
h00!

Well, I assumed they put it in there because they figured youngsters wouldn't know who he was, which is what made me feel old. I guess if I assume they put it in there because people in general wouldn't know who he was, then it should make me feel smart, yes?

[Edited to add: If you really know who he is, though, do you know his first name? ]

__________________
SeanF

"Ask to understand, but don't challenge unless you have the knowledge."--NEOWatcher

The contents of this post are ©2009 by SeanF and may not be copied or retransmitted in any form without the express written consent of SeanF

lol same here, except im 18. To me, hes a hero

Ahh the beauty of unhealthy kill-you-with-a-stroke but delicious chicken 8)

Good quote for a geocentricity thread.

Harland? Harland Sanders? Harland David Sanders? Ah, good.











Ok, so I cheated. Link.

__________________
h00!

lol I actually knew his first name was Harland though. Im an avid KFC customer, so I know the full name of the founding father of the most delicious chicken on Earth

See, that's the trouble with asking trivia questions on the web - you never really know if the person knew it or just looked it up!

For the record, I wouldn't have known his middle name was David. Although, I don't know why the record would be interested in that. :-?

__________________
SeanF

"Ask to understand, but don't challenge unless you have the knowledge."--NEOWatcher

The contents of this post are ©2009 by SeanF and may not be copied or retransmitted in any form without the express written consent of SeanF

The record would be interested due to the extreme nitpicking nature of the record. :wink:

__________________
"The oxen are slow, but the earth is patient."

JOHN F. KENNEDY: "Ask not what the road can do for the chicken, ask what the chicken can do for the road"

NEIL ARMSTRONG: "That's one small step on the road, one giant leap for chicken-kind"

JULIUS CAESAR: "I came to the road, I saw the road, I crossed the road"

PHIL PLAIT: "RCH has shown pictures of the road on Mars, but until he can use basic scientific method to actually show that a chicken has crossed it, I will continue to debunk his theories"

.

NANCY LEIDER: The chicken fell across the road when the earth stopped rotating.

DEBUNKERS: No! That's just a lens flare! [-(

HB's: The chicken could not possibly have crossed the road... the needed technology wasn't adequate to have allowed such a venture at the time it was supposed to have crossed the road. When it realized that it did not have the means to make the crossing, a vast conspiracy was hatched involving tens of thousands so a chicken could be filmed crossing a fake road built to look like the real thing out at Area 51 in the Nevada desert!!

THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE!!!

It probably saw something it wanted to eat on the other side of the road.

__________________
"Most editorials are written by people that love to argue but got kicked off debate team for not making any sense." -Seanbaby

SITCHIN: Thanks to my advanced knowledge of Middle Eastern languages and cuneiform tablets, I have concluded that the "chicken" (Sumerian CHI-kan) is actually Planet X, and the "road" (Akkadian rud) is actually the solar system.

ORIEL36:
There is no road! It's a fraud perpetratrated by the inventor of spacetime to obscure the true meaning of the equation of time!

[Lengthy quotes from the Principia omitted for brevity.]

CELESTIAL MECHANIC:
Well, here's a back-of-the-envelope calculation. First imagine a uniformly dense spherical chicken of radius R and density rho. [Remainder of lengthy computation omitted for brevity.]

__________________
Microsoft is over if you want it.

The bar has been lowered for the promotion of ATM ideas; the bar for the acceptance of ATM ideas must remain high.

Elementary school student: Oooo! A chicken! It's cute! What's his name? Are there any baby chickens? What do they look like? What are their names? You're not listening!!!!!
Middle school student: Oh, a chicken. Bo-ring! :roll:
High school student: Will this be on the test?

__________________
Yes, I have a life. It's quite different from yours.

No, no, no... that is the college undergraduate's question anytime a professor or post-doc brings in a prominent authority on the subject at hand in order to enrich the students' appreciation of the subject matter... #-o

Haven't been there yet but I've heard it it my high school's hallways many a time. Followed by the teacher ramming his head on the chalkboard. :wink:

__________________
Yes, I have a life. It's quite different from yours.

Hmmmm... Fascinating... high school would then seem to be similar to the undergraduate college environment. :-k
:wink:

That's a lie propagated by the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy. But Al Gore did consistently vote for poultry subsidies during his years in the Senate.

__________________
Microsoft is over if you want it.

The bar has been lowered for the promotion of ATM ideas; the bar for the acceptance of ATM ideas must remain high.

From "The Family Guy"

Peter: “Whoa whoa whoa wait a second?  You’re telling me I flew all the way to Kentucky to get some of your fried chicken, and the Colonel isn’t even working today?”
Employee: “He ain’t away, he dead.”
Peter: “What?”
Employee: I say he dead.
Peter: (louder)“Is Mr. Sanders in?”
Employee: “What wrong with you?  I say you he dead.”
Peter: (Pause, then much louder) “The Colonel.”

Guess it's probably better to see the episode.

BOB MARLEY: There should be some pot in every chicken!

JOHN EDWARDS: To get to the Other Side!

__________________
If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about the answers.

PROFESSOR HAROLD HILL:

Well, either you’re closing your eyes to a situation you do not wish to acknowledge, or you are not aware of the caliber of disaster indicated by a chicken crossing the road...


Wellll, ya got Trouble, my friend, right here, I say Trouble in Tyson City. Why sure I’ve been a chicken plucker, always mighty proud to say, always mighty proud to say it. I consider the hours I’ve spent with a chicken in my hands are golden, helped to cultivate horse sense, and a cool head, and a keen eye. D’ya ever try and go and pluck three chickens by yourself in less than a minute?

Well just as I say it takes judgment, brains, and maturity to clean a Buckeye hen, I say that any boob can go and shove a chicken across the road. And I call that sloth, the first big step on the road to the depths of degra-day...I say first, a chicken crossing the road, then pullets on the freeway.

And the next thing ya know, your best-bred chickens are running for a piece of suet, and listening to some big Out-of-town Sultan, hear ‘im tell about chicken gambling. Not a wholesome struttin’ race. No! But a game where they bet down right off the bird! How’d you like see some stuck-up 4Hers betting on your prize Dutch? Make your blood boil? Well, I should say.

Friends let me tell you what I mean, ya got one, two, three, four, five-six quality breeds of chicken. Breeds that mark the difference between a farmer and a bum, with a capital B and that rhymes with C and that stands for Chickens!...crossing the road!

And all week long your Tyson City chickens are gonna be fritterin’ away, I say your best chickens are gonna be fritterin! Fritterin’ away their settin' time, peckin' time, egg time too! Get the chicken ‘cross the road, never mind gittin’ meal et, fattenin’ up, or mindin’ the chicks. Never mind getting over two pounds til the work crews are caught with the Tyson trucks empty on a Monday night!

Trouble! Oh yes we got lots and lots of Trouble. I’m thinkin’ of the chicks in the barnyard, Cornish hens thinking ‘bout crossing that road after dark. Look folks, right here in Tyson City, Trouble with a capital T and that rhymes with C and that stands for Chickens!...crossing the road!

Now I know all you folks are the right kind of farmers, I’m going to be perfectly frank, would ya like to know what kind stuff goes on while out there crossing that road? Well, they’re feeding on oatmeal,...soybeans, bio-altered feed, and braggin’ all about how they’re gonna cross the road in the other direction.

One fine night they leave the barnyard headin’ for the corporate farm by the Interstate! Rhode Island Reds, and Scarlet Bantams, and Capons! Sexless chickens that will drag your sons, your daughters into the arms of a barnyard of animal instincts, MASS-STERIA!! Oh friend, the KFC is the Devil’s Playground!

Trouble! Ya got Trouble! Trouble right here in Tyson City!

Farmers: Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble,...

Farmers of Tyson City! Heed that warning before it’s too late! Watch for the telltale signs of corruption! When your chickens leave the henhouse, do they all look toward the road? Is there familiar-looking roadkill outside your driveway, crime-thinking chickens hidden by the corncrib? Are you starting to see mesmerized Cochins standin' 'round the fencing? Are certain birds creeping into your flock? Birds like, like...CATALANAS, and NAKED NECK TURKENS?

If so, my friends, Ya got Trouble! Trouble with a capital T and that rhymes with C, and that stands for Chickens!...crossing the road!

We’ve surely got Trouble, right here in Tyson City! Right here! Remember the grain, Plymouth Rock, and the Golden Mantaza Rule!
Our chicken’s chickens gonna have Trouble!

Oh, we got Trouble, we’re in terrible, terrible Trouble! That road with the county numbered lanes is the Devil’s Tool! Devil’s Tool!
Oh yes, we’re in Trouble, Trouble, Trouble! Oh yes, we’re in Trouble big, we’re in big, big Trouble, with a T!,... gotta rhyme it with C!,... and that stands for Chickens!!!

...crossing the road!

(Remember, my friends, listen to me, for I cross this road but once!)



[edited to add 3 words]

__________________
A person's name, or a mark representing it, as signed personally or by deputy, as in subscribing a letter or other document.

GERMAN: "We have to put up a 'Danger! Chickens crossing!' road sign!"
GERMAN: "Where is the responsible farmer?"
GERMAN: "We have to build a tunnel under the road to allow future chicken a safe crossing."

Harald

__________________
"Flying in space is risky business, but just staying on this planet is risky business too." - John Young, astronaut

To see his flat mate

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