I, for one, welcome our wife-smooching Overlord...

Trachemys scripta elegans finally pokes out again.

Hi, Hump!

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Wonder Bread helps build strong bodies twelve ways.

No, it could be Northeast Ohio - it took me an hour and a half to shovel out my driveway this morning so I could spend an hour and a half driving to work. A rowboat sounds good.

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At night the stars put on a show for free (Carole King)

One Earth, One Sky - IYA 2009
All moderation in purple

Oh He of the Mighty Shell, if I'm a really good minion, might I trade small parts of Rural Kansas for small parts of the Maritimes, given that I'm already here and all?

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. o O ( "Quote that 'Blazing Saddles' scene at Mike, and the BAUTer gets it! " )

What the hey, I live in Maryland, so "Fear the Turtle" is already in the vocabulary.

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I'm not completely heartless, the doctor who removed it told me he'd never be able to get it all.

Moose: the application for transference of fiefdom [Form: 1342.c.2.a with attached ammendments A through ZZ] needs to be filled out by 47.32 hours from stating you would like to transfer. This should be done with no less than seven hand written copies. Signatures of at least 13 linear ancestors must be accompanies. If they happen to be deceased, a proxy may be submitted, however the deceased must have, in their will allowed the proxy, by name, to be their proxy.

If none of this can be accomplished in the relevant timespan, a random selection will be administered. If the random selection allows the transferral, then a secondary inquest will commence and a second random selection will select the location of the new fiefdom.

Right now there are openings inside the three mile island quarantine zone, a house next to Pauly Shore, and a large 1000 acre land spot next to the new home of the world largest ball of yarn in Maryland.

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"It takes Thousands to fight a battle for a mile, Millions to hold an election for a nation, but it only takes One to change the world."
G'Topia

Man, I guess they're right about what they say about red tape. Ah well, I'll just install SNMP on rural Kansas and firewall the heck out of it. Manage it remotely.

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. o O ( "Quote that 'Blazing Saddles' scene at Mike, and the BAUTer gets it! " )

Hey, Humph! Thought you were gone for good.

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Quaeso quousque humi defixa tua mens erit? Nonne aspicis, quae in templa veneris?

Good news! I found it! It was under your spell checker manual.

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A person's name, or a mark representing it, as signed personally or by deputy, as in subscribing a letter or other document.

Oooo! Big ball of yarn!

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Gillian

"Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"

"You can't erase icing."

"I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"

You're not quite at 100%. I'm still running the Fifth. You can tell when you cross the boundary.You'll hear three G eighth notes followed by an E Flat half note (with fermata).

3 Gs. That's more than I get every year for running this place...

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A person's name, or a mark representing it, as signed personally or by deputy, as in subscribing a letter or other document.

Can I have the house on top of Pauly Shore?

On that note, has Gillian met our Wondeful and Shell-Covered Emperor?
He might be in danger if he doesn't make use of that manual.

Oh, yes, Gillian's met him. She doesn't pick on every little detail, you know, and she actually manages to be friends with R.A.F., despite his rather, um, peculiar notions of quotation marks.

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Gillian

"Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"

"You can't erase icing."

"I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"

We pick on you a little too much, don't we?

Your Turtleness, may I suggest that the Lady receive her desired fiefdom? She has suffered the language-challenged science-addicts here for a long time, and is rather deserving of it.

The House next to Pauly Shore is available at the moment and I would be glad to give it to the Lady of the syntax. I shal even throw in a free pointy stick to ward off his eventual advances and his stand up routines on your doorstep.

The manual was never found, only a single section of the cover explaining in big bold words: "PANIC IN AN ORDERLY FASHION!".
So we decided to secretly move the DOOMSDAY machine into a secret hiding place in the North Eastern United States. We has still yet to figure out how to shut it off, or remove its power source.
It has been suggested that we damage the thing, but when we bought it, we also purchased the optional warranty plan and every time we damage it, a technician is sent out to fix it again. Damn salesman! See the Warranty plans are evil!

Oh well at least my plans for world domination are going well. The worldwide rebellion is still going full swing and the denial in the media about my domination of 95% of the planet is sadly still going on. But fo not worry, I have a plan. Now all i gotta do is get Michael Jackson, Tom Cruise, that crazy Astronaut lady, and Elvis into one room to get the medias attention. then I will run in and make my announcement to the live media.

Hmm...big event...I will need a new outfit.

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"It takes Thousands to fight a battle for a mile, Millions to hold an election for a nation, but it only takes One to change the world."
G'Topia

The Lady can sew. Does that help?

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Gillian

"Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"

"You can't erase icing."

"I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"

Well you will have to fight Moose for it. I have rented a slightly used gladiatorial arena for a weekend. I can let you two fight it out in if for the spot. Just watch the blood. I recently had it cleaned and i really do not want to have to hire all of those workers over again. So i will set down newspapers and you can bleed on those. Just make sure to stop and reset them of the newspapers jostle about.

Grapes: yes you can have the airspace over Pauly Shore. However he has asked for you to keep down the music to normal level.

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"It takes Thousands to fight a battle for a mile, Millions to hold an election for a nation, but it only takes One to change the world."
G'Topia

No, you misunderstand. I didn't want the house over Pauly Shore, I wanted the house on top of Pauly Shore. I'll give his ruby slippers to my kids.