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Yeah, nothing's easy. I took my Mother-in-Law to the 100 car demolition derby.
She wanted to drive in the event, but they said she was too aggressive!! ![]() She wanted a part time job. She was lucky in was Halloween. They hired her at Spooky World. Yeah...some days are better than others. Yesterday,I saw her picture on the back of a milk carton!! Best regards, Dan |
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Laughter is essential. We all need to laugh. People who laugh considerably less are not pleasant. How are those daily text jokes? I have been tempted to sign up but I don't want to waste money on jokes that are older than me. To keep a lighter outlook, most of the time, I try to store random Family Guy or Simpson quotes in my head. They get old though.
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thanks for your replies, infact I have laughed when I read your above replies but I am welcoming more replies, because you know, hearing comedy from others is a very joyful thing, hence do it now, do always.
![]() sunil ( I have a great bank of jokes but here the space is the limit!, no not time is the limit for typing, you know playing fingers on the key board require more pains! ). |
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Former Connecticut Governor John Rowland told this one on C-SPAN yesterday:
As Supreme Allied Commander of Europe, General Wesley Clark himself phoned the Motor Pool to find out how many vehicles were in inventory. After rattling off the numbers for various vehicle types, whoever answered his call was asked if that were all. Pondering a moment, he added, "Oh yes, and one Jeep for the stupid General." Clark then asked, "Do you know who this is?" "No, sir", was the reply. "This is General Wesley Clark." "General, do you know who this is?" "No, I don't." "Goodbye, stupid!" |
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So they sent up a Priest to talk with me..... ....He said " On Your Mark !!! " ![]() |
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one man who was on the top of the tower and declared that he is jumping from the tower of the building, all people gather at the bottom of the building, later that man jumped from the tower which was just 20 meter high, he was just jumped on the spunge bade on the building's terrace. He just jumped inside not outside of the building from the tower.
![]() if comedy done on the dining table then one can eat more. hence do it very often on the dining table, because most of the people take a very little diet due to stress, if their stress goes down then they can eat more and without any sort of tension. |
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Please except this story for the humorous value rather than the discomfort of not knowing how to react. I have no insecurities about the situation. If you can't laugh at yourself...
I have been known to be a bit reckless when it comes to trying new things. Jumping in with both feet (not literally...see below) without actually knowing what I am doing. Having gone skiing once before at Bolton Valley (skilift time roughly two minutes), I though making it down the mountain without falling meant you knew how to ski. So when hubby suggested we go to Gore, I thought I was up to it. Our first run, first morning, first time on the skilift, I began questioning why we were on the ski lift for going on 15 minutes. It was only then that he realized that I had not actually left the bowl of Bolton Valley and am not the experienced skier that he thought I was. Having an artificial left leg, no adaptive lessons, and no real experience on a mountain, he suggested I stay on and ride the ski lift down. No way, I know what I am doing. Off we go and I made it to the first landing without incident. He tells me I was going way too fast and need to learn to fall. sorry but that is exactly what I am trying not to do. Off we go. Only now, the incline is way to great for any effective slowing techniques to work. Oh well, go with it. I did what I see the professionals do, tuck. Wow, I am going really fast. Hubby can't catch me so he starts screaming, "Fall!" No way, not at this speed. That is going to hurt. Up ahead, I see an instructor with a young boy, roughly 6, so I lean to keep my path clear and now I am so close to trees, I can hear them wizzing by, only now I can't seem to get back over. My choices are now, hit a tree at this speed or fall. the latter seems less painful so with the trees to my right, I throw myself to the left and straight into the trees I slide. Mercifully, the brush managed to bring my speed back down to ludicrus right before my good leg slamming into a tree brought me to a halt. I am alive but something doesn't feel right. In my screaming pain, I look around to find my prosthetic leg, still in the ski, is about twenty feet down the mountain. Hubby finally catches up to me by following the wreckage trail and a few seconds behind him is the instructor and young boy. The instructor tells the boy to stay while she goes and gets ski patrol and I can't imagine how scarred that kid was from the way I was screaming, "My leg, oh god my leg." I meant the one that hit the tree. My husband did attempt to explain that the missing limb is not a result of the skiing incident to the boy, but I am not to sure he understood. In the end, I had a sprained knee, torn ligaments, and a permanent indent in my shin to remind me that reckless does not equal cool. We still like to speculate on how it would look had the leg continued on down the mountain, the rest of the way...without me. |
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Oh my! That's one of the best stories i've heard in a long time. Well, funniest anyway. Sounds quite painful...but what doesn't kill you only maims...or something like that.
Poor kid! ...oh, yeah, and poor you Altho I'm sure he still bragged at school how he saw some woman who crahed soo bad her leg got cut off.
__________________
I'm like one of those idiot savants...well, except for the savant part. |
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I hope that is what he is doing and not sitting in a straight jacket somewhere, twitching everytime someone says the word snow. I really wouldn't say poor me, that was sheer stupidity. It still makes for one of my best stories though.
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Naw, stupidity would be repeating the episode again. That was just a TLJ (temporary lapse of judgement). Or, since you obviously are scientifically inclined, it was an experimant on the relationship between gravitational forces, slopes, and trees, and thier effect on the solidarity of your shin and knee.
__________________
I'm like one of those idiot savants...well, except for the savant part. |
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