"Attack of the Cloes": that sounds absolutely scary!

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There's one on the radio lately that causes me to change the station immediately. The newlyweds show up at the resort, overhear that "the man in the shiny black van" is running a sale, and cancel the honeymoon to go get their carpets cleaned. Right.

"Our customers are morons" is an underlying theme in a great many commercials, especially on the radio.

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Cum catapultae proscribeantur tum soli proscripti catapultas habeant.

Little, yellow, different, better? (Does anyone but me remember that commercial? It's referenced in the first Wayne's World movie, for the confused--as I can't remember the product. Painkiller of some kind.)

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Gillian

"Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"

"You can't erase icing."

"I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"

Nuprin

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A Nerd can figure out how long it will take the original Enterprise traveling at warp 6.5 to travel from Regulus to Antares.
A Geek will think he can use that to pick up a girl in a bar.
A Dork knows he can't pick up the girl with it, but will hang around for hours anyway, just in case she asks.
She might. You never know.

Thanks--I haven't watched the movie recently, and the commercial hasn't been on since the '90s.

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Gillian

"Now everyone was giving her that kind of look UFOlogists get when they suddenly say, 'Hey, if you shade your eyes you can see it is just a flock of geese after all.'"

"You can't erase icing."

"I can't believe it doesn't work! I found it on the internet, man!"

Only if the target customers are men; if the target customers are women, then it's about what morons men are.

nice one Delvo!

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clear skies

If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe. CARL SAGAN

I'm going to have to watch for that one. I'm betting you're right.

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Cum catapultae proscribeantur tum soli proscripti catapultas habeant.

Last night I noticed one that actually has the moron wife. The husband gets a call from his buddy and tells her "That's Bill, he really has to vent," and wife looks sooo understanding and tells hubby "You get right over there and be with him." The point being some new beer can has a vent in the top so apparently you can pour it down your throat without gurgling. I think Captain Morgan spiced rum has a similar concept (clever husband out drinking, telling dumb wife he's visiting his sick cousing or something).

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The Devil offered me power. I told him I preferred aperture.

The Captain Morgan one has the guy in a bar with all the other patrons imitating sounds of the TV so his wife will think he's home sick instead of going to her cousin's wedding or whatever it was. Instead of "Our customers are morons" it's "Our customers are lying jerks."

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Cum catapultae proscribeantur tum soli proscripti catapultas habeant.

I saw an ad - I think it's for Claritin - wherein some NASCAR driver says "When choosing an allergy medication be sure to check with your doctor and carefully read the label.....or you can do what I do..."

Sure, forget the doctor and the label and listen to a guy who drives in circles for a living.

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"It was a crime of passion! Not premeditated dentistry!"

What is it he does? Smashing his car into another, so his pain drives the thoughts about his allergy away?

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"Who does not know anything, must believe everything."
Baroness Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach 1830-1916

Just to interject, one that I like is the AFLAC duck driving in the NASCAR race.

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Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by ignorance or stupidity.
Isaac Asimov

I like all the AFLAC duck commercials.

Now that baseball season has started, they've brought back the Yogi one.

"And they give you cash, which is just as good as money."

I must have heard it a hundred times, and I still chuckle.

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Cum catapultae proscribeantur tum soli proscripti catapultas habeant.

Yogi used to recommend a restaurant on 57th Street, but as he said, "It's so crowded nobody goes there anymore."

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Then there's this beauty. I mean, what do we really use telescopes for?





Of course the "astronomer" set-up is ideal for assuring optimal observing conditions. Plus in the context of the commercial the "peeping tom" application is indicated as an improvement "tweak" over the "astronomer" application.

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Well... Umm. Maybe that window is really one sheet of diffraction limited broadband filter coated magic glass. That would explain why he can't afford a descent scope and furniture. And curtains.

How tall is the peeping tom? The EP is at the top. He's either 5 feet tall when seated, or 3 feet tall and stands on the chair.

I've taken my 16" dob out in front of the house a few times. People will stop by and there seems to always be one that asks if look in windows with it. I usually tell them that "real" telescopes can't focus on anything under about 2 miles.

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A Nerd can figure out how long it will take the original Enterprise traveling at warp 6.5 to travel from Regulus to Antares.
A Geek will think he can use that to pick up a girl in a bar.
A Dork knows he can't pick up the girl with it, but will hang around for hours anyway, just in case she asks.
She might. You never know.

Where can I get one of those? And while you're at it, where can I get one of those doomsday machines?

Of course, regarding the latter, I'd take of photos of it and save them as a couple of bmps prior to deployment.

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A person's name, or a mark representing it, as signed personally or by deputy, as in subscribing a letter or other document.

Oddly enough, at Big Ed's House of Diffraction Limited, Broadband Filter Coated Magic Glass, and Deli. The story is: they used to make the table tops out of them, but the servers kept missing them and setting the soup in peoples laps. When it turned out that there was more interest in the tables than in the okra based gazpacho-like soup that was their best seller, they changed the name.

It's what I've heard.

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A Nerd can figure out how long it will take the original Enterprise traveling at warp 6.5 to travel from Regulus to Antares.
A Geek will think he can use that to pick up a girl in a bar.
A Dork knows he can't pick up the girl with it, but will hang around for hours anyway, just in case she asks.
She might. You never know.